Adult Novelty Store Evades Nanny State’s Pleasure Police

"It’s a new level of privacy, and it feels good to give something back to the community,” business owner Sherri Williams said of her newest adult store location that offers drive-thru convenience.

Having failed to overturn Alabama’s ban on sex toys after a hot date with the Supreme Court in 2007, the owner of an adult novelty store in Huntsville has found a way to bring pleasure to the people by taking advantage of a loophole in the state’s anti-obscenity law.

Citizens who can prove “a bona fide medical, scientific, educational, legislative, judicial or law enforcement purpose” requiring devices that provide “stimulation of human genital organs” have the state’s blessing to purchase sex toys at Sherri Williams drive-thru “romance shop,” Pleasures.

Those adults who can not complete the state-mandated medical questionnaire that Williams requires upon checkout are left to their own devices because big government bureaucrats fear they’d use the devices for “immoral purposes.”

Are you buzzed-off or tickled pink by the so-called anti-obscenity law that leaves Alabama as the last state in the nation to prohibit citizens from purchasing adult novelties?

Students Fight for ‘Right’ to Bump and Grind

"Dude! I'm totally grinding that girl from Biology class. Sweet!!!"

A public high school in Maine has banned ‘dirty dancing’ aka ‘grinding’ to the dismay of hormonally challenged students who are threatening to boycott this weekend’s homecoming dance.

Portland High School senior Felix Cobanovic told the Portland Press Herald that grinding is the “dance style of his generation” while classmate Grace Hanley, a junior, remarked, “Adults see it as a sexual thing, but it’s more of a social thing.”

Some students argue that despite adults’ beliefs that grinding has everything to do with simulating sex and nothing to do with dancing, junior Keelia Ryan admits things can get out of hand, but it’s nothing teenage girls can’t handle on their own, much less anything for their parents to worry about.

“The problem for some girls is when some random guy comes up behind them and starts grinding on them,” Ryan said. “But if you don’t want to dance with a boy, you just move away from him. You have to be assertive.”

Ahmed Ahmed, a senior, agrees with Ryan’s insistence that students should be allowed to handle situations that arise on the dance floor on their own, without adults interfering.

“It’s treating us like we’re children, and some of us are already 18,” Ahmed said. “Girls don’t have to dance with someone they don’t like. They can just say no. I was turned down five times at one dance. I just moved on and danced with a lot of other girls.”

Despite the pleas and threats from students, Principal Mike Johnson said he’s not going to budge on his anti-grinding policy that prohibits boys and girls from grinding their pelvises and crotches to the hottest beats, even if it’s the only way they know how to ‘dance.’

“I have 1,000 parents who love me and 1,000 students who are mad at me,” Johnson said. “They’re upset because they think I’m trying to ruin their dance, but I’m just trying to keep them safe and teach them how to act with responsibility and civility in a public place.”

Whose side are you on? The mean old principal who just doesn’t understand this generation’s groove or the misunderstood teenagers with raging hormones in need of dance lessons?

Public School Bans “Grinding” and “Excessive” PDA

A nanny state victory or another assault on freedom?

Love it or hate it, the only way that too many teenagers know how to dance is by getting ‘close and personal’ with their partner(s). Well, that’s about to change in one Massachusetts public high school, thanks to administrators who are fed-up with watching students simulate sexual acts on the dance floor.

Oakmont Regional High School Assistant Principal Greg Smith announced this week that he is instituting a zero-tolerance policy towards “inappropriate dancing” at dances in the coming school year. Last year, he and other adults supervising the prom witnessed “grinding” among students that “bordered on obscene.”

According to the Sentinel & Enterprise, the 2010-2011 Oakmont student handbook was recently updated to include: “Behavior at any school function must be consistent with the standards of decency, maturity and respect that we expect from all members of our school community.”

Will school officials ban armpit licking, too?

In addition to prohibiting “dirty dancing” among students, school officials are also outlawing “excessive public displays of affection.” Back in the day, public displays of affection or “PDA” related to kissing in public and nothing more. One can only assume what “excessive” refers to these days, and it probably has nothing to do with expressing affection or respect between partners if it’s being done on the dance floor.

The good news, for those that still maintain an ounce of dignity, self-respect and moral values, is that there are now rules in place to ensure nobody’s hands go below the waist as to avoid any potential for contact with “sensitive areas.”

Banning all of these practices will not teach students how to respect themselves and each other, just like banning smoking in bars won’t encourage smokers to quit, if that’s the desired goal for nanny state bureaucrats. Whether students who buck the ban receive detention, demerits or suspensions, those punishments will only encourage them to be more covert or just go elsewhere the next time they’re tempted to break the rules.

Parents should be teaching their children how to properly interact and engage with members of the opposite sex and teachers should be promoting values that foster healthy and safe relationships between young men and women with mutual respect as one of the ultimate life lessons to be learned.

In an ideal world, that scenario might happen. In the public school system, administrators have made it clear that they’re not in the business of teaching kids values and the difference between right and wrong, but they sure know how to punish kids for doing things they would know were wrong if someone just took the time to teach them why.

We’ll leave it up to readers to make the call on how or if the public school system has dropped the ball on helping kids grow-up to be responsible adults. Sound-off below.

Sex Talk “Critical” to School Kids’ Educational Development

Thanks to Jedediah Bila at Human Events for shining the spotlight on a critical issue that never would have seen the light of day in the State-Run Media!

Talk about needing some "sexual healing!" Don't let the nanny state corrupt another innocent mind!

Helena Public Schools in Montana recently released a 62-page draft proposal titled “Helena Public Schools Health Enhancement K-12 Critical Competencies,” which they claim “represent content that students are expected to know at each grade level. The Critical Competencies are not the entire curriculum, but learner outcomes should be taught in [sic] sequential, systematic approach to promote an appropriate foundation to health & wellness.”Some of the many topics included in the proposal are Human Sexuality, Reproductive System, and Sexually Transmitted Infections. Here are some highlights:

• Kindergarten: “Introduce basic reproductive body parts (penis, vagina, breast, nipples, testicles, scrotum, uterus).

• Grade 1: “Understand human beings can love people of the same gender & people of another gender.”

• Grade 5: “Understand barrier methods of contraception (e.g. male and female condoms, dental dams can greatly reduce but not prevent STIs)”

• Grade 5: “Understand sexual orientation refers to a person’s physical and/or romantic attraction to an individual of the same and/or different gender, and is one part of one’s personality.”

• Grade 6: “Understand that sexual intercourse includes but is not limited to vaginal, oral, or anal penetration; using the penis, fingers, tongue or objects.”

• Grade 7: “Discuss the Supreme Court decision that has ruled that, to a certain extent, people have the right to make personal decisions concerning sexuality & reproductive health matters, such as abortion, sterilization, and contraception.”

• Grades 9-12: “Understand erotic images in art reflect society’s views about sexuality & help people understand sexuality”

Be sure to thank Jedediah Bila for bringing this issue to the attention of parents and concerned citizens who have been targeted, once again, by big government bureaucrats trying to push their sick and twisted agenda on innocent children. And, please let her know the Nanny State Liberation Front appreciate her efforts, too!

If we allow this nanny state atrocity to happen in one public school, it can happen at any public school. Don’t let another innocent and impressionable child fall victim to sick and twisted bureaucrats who think they are more capable of raising children and preparing them for the future than their own parents. Join the Nanny State Liberation Front today!

On the Front Lines

"What would Michelle say?"

June 16, 2010

Obese Women More Prone to Endure Long ‘Sex Droughts’
Chicago Sun-Times; June 16, 2010
Another great reason for the government to step-up its efforts and crack down on obesity!

President Obama’s Junk Food Habit Stimulates Fast Food Joints He Patronizes
NDTV via AP; June 16, 2010
Everywhere he pigs-out turns to gold!

In Hollywood, Michelle Obama Indulges in Fattening Foods Not on Her Government Menu
LA Weekly; June 15, 2010
Anti-obesity queen and her kids enjoy “bing cherry clafoutis with crème fraîche and hazelnut praline ice cream.” What a role model!

Conservative Ted Nugent Embraces Michelle Obama’s Diet Tips for Kids
The Washington Times; June 15, 2010
Looks like Ted drank the Kool-Aid.

CBS News Suggests US Initiate a “Cash for Chunkers” Program
CBS News; June 14, 2010
Brilliant! Anyone who’s overweight should receive taxpayer dollars so they can buy ‘healthy’ foods on the honor system. Maybe we should try a similar tactic with crack addicts, too?

British Nanny State Cracks Down on Thumb-sucking Kids
Telegraph (UK); June 13, 2010
“Weapons in [orthodontists’] arsenal include a range of metal devices fitted in the mouth, which mean those who suck thumbs or fingers no longer derive comfort from it.”