Tag Archives: subway

CAPTIONFEST: Who’s Your Nanny?

It looks like motorists in Tacoma, Wash., have a tough dilemma on their hands. Do they respect the parking laws of the city or the wishes of Subway?

“I’m wondering if Subway is sending these out and trying to override municipal parking regulations all across the nation,” asks ‘Justin,’ who submitted the image of dueling parking signs to Consumerist.com.

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Petraeus to Liberate Exiled Burger King and His Food Court

"I knew I was making the right decision by replacing McChrystal with Petraeus. Long live the king!"

"I knew I was making the right decision by replacing McChrystal with Petraeus. Long live the king!"

A few short months ago, General Stanley McChrystal, the former commander of Special Forces in Iraq, dethroned the Burger King and put him in exile. Thanks to General David Petraeus, McChrystal’s replacement, the ‘Home of the Whopper’ will soon return to several military bases in Afghanistan among a host of other fast food delights.

Command Sergeant-Major Michael T. Hall said he and McCrystal were “looking for ways to do things more efficiently across the battlefield” upon their arrival in Afghanistan, The Sunday Times (UK) reported on March 30. Branding troops as drunks and trying to make them forget what ‘freedom’ tastes like were just a few of their brilliant military strategies.

In September 2009, McChrystal banned alcohol at his headquarters, blaming an abundance of “hangovers” suffered by his staff as reason to curb their drinking altogether (heck of a way to boost the morale of your troops, General — call ’em all drunks!), The Times reported. On February 3, 2010, McChrystal ordered 50 Army and Air Force Exchange Service concessionaires to close within 90 days following his arbitrary and, apparently, unfavorable “review of morale, welfare and recreation activities,” noted the Army Times.

The Army Times reported yesterday that Petraeus seems convinced that American troops can efficiently operate on the battlefield while enjoying Whoppers and fries on their free time. While no formal order has been given by Petraeus to liberate the ‘King’ in exile and his food court that includes Pizza Hut and Subway, Army Col. Erik Gunhus indicated that halting McChrystal’s ‘War on Whoppers’ is “on the table” and awaiting final approval.

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Fancy Some ‘Wing’ Nuts?

Like This!

Got nuts?

Got nuts?

If over-protective Nanny State bureaucrats get their way, the only place you’ll be able to eat peanuts during a flight will be on the airplane’s wings.

Peanut allergy activists are actively urging the Department of Transportation (DoT) to prohibit airlines from distributing those beloved little peanut bags to passengers because they say the nut dust could potentially kill them.

Anyone who has looked at the labels on snack foods these days — whether it’s pretzels or candy — has seen the warning, “This product was produced in a facility that processes nuts.” Now, if the DoT successfully ban peanuts from flights, it would seem to make sense that they’d also want to make sure passengers’ carry-on snacks are allergen-free, too.

In an Administration where anything is possible these days, we might be looking at an all-out ban on passengers eating any food on airplanes — unless it’s government approved or examined at the security gates. Hey, let’s create an Air Travel Peanut Allergy Czar!

While the DoT is contemplating a peanut ban on airlines, they have neglected to consider other modes of public transportation such as trains and buses where food is freely consumed by passengers. Oops! We shouldn’t be giving big government any ideas for expanding their Nanny State policies.

Well, that’s exactly the type of emotion-driven politics you can expect from near-sighted Nanny State bureaucrats who hear someone making a big fuss and just want to “plug the damn hole” without considering the bigger picture.

Learn how you can plug big government’s hole with a permanent solution. Join the Nanny State Liberation Front!